What are you doing surfing the Web?! You should be PRAYING!
I don't hear your stomach rumbling! I'll bet you ATE TOO MUCH today!
You probably ATE TOO MUCH because your TEETH DON'T HURT ENOUGH -- because you haven't been GNASHING them enough!
You're not wearing STREET CLOTHES are you? Where's your SACKCLOTH? Say, that sackcloth looks UNTORN!
WHERE'S YOUR HAIRSHIRT?
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!?!?!